Author Archives: Jo Clark

SHAME: The gremlin behind most dysfunction!

Shame is something we start to carry within us from an early age. “You shouldn’t have taken an extra cookie” “Did you break that vase?” “Your sister is good at math….why do you have such problems with it?” Parents, Teachers, Siblings and Friends mean well, but you’ve heard the comments that cut like a knife, and sadly, stay with you for the long haul. They create a new story in our heads, like “I’m not good at things like my sister” or worse, “I’m not good enough” period. The thing is, that’s a lie.

When Brené Brown, Ph.D., LMSW and research professor interviewed thousands of patients seeking counseling, she discovered SHAME was at the root of most dysfunction. I’m sure most of us realize that the reason for the shame is almost always NOT your fault, especially when you’re a child. And even if you exhibit bad behavior, isn’t that only human?

So how do you lay the shame in your life to rest?
1) Identify it – become aware of whatever story is holding you back and put it out in the light
2) Decide and Accept the fact that it’s not you fault
3) Let it go – recognize that this lie is not serving you anymore and FLUSH IT!
4) Replace it- with a positive confession. Whenever you purge something negative, you MUST replace it with something new that is functional or supportive. So say, “I am enough, just the way I am”. “I love myself, I love my life”. And say it proud. Say it dozens of times per day.
For information on Jo Clark or to follow her nteresting blog post go to: or her network marketing website which is

Also view Oprah and Brene Brown’s online class on Scrubbing Your Shame at:–Daring-Greatly